Be Reckless

Why it is worth it

Some people are more reckless than others by nature. It does not matter what you are taught or the environment you grew up in. Take siblings. My sister and I had the same parents and the same teachings. But Marina is a different person than I am.

I was a tomboy and my mom’s nightmare since I was a toddler. As soon as I moved my first steps, I wanted to run. Walking wasn’t fast and exciting enough. And I started to throw myself in crazy endeavors just for the heck of it. I was craving adventure more than food. By the time I was 3, I was already an adrenaline junkie. Yes, I broke my bones more than once but I learned that failure is not such a terrible thing. You get yourself together and then try again. Doing so, I did some “impossible” things. Achieving them against all odds made me think that nothing is “impossible”. I would still trade a broken wrist for confidence. But that’s just me.

Then there are other millions of people who neither had my experiences nor my drive since childhood. Can they be reckless? You bet they can. And it is definitely worth to be. You can be a soccer mom living in the suburbs, and you can learn to add a little pinch of adventure in your daily life. It adds to the taste without altering the original recipe—if that’s what you like. It makes it spicier and juicier. It’s just like cooking. A hint of chili or black cracked pepper can improve the flavor.

Leonora Carrington, a famous surrealist painter, told me of the time when she got married and had children, in Mexico. All of a sudden, she found herself more absorbed in her busy daily life as a housewife. But she was also eager to learn lessons from that new world she was discovering, all that new life around her and inside her. She became acquainted with some women of the Chiapas Indians tribe living nearby. She noticed that they were always mixing an egg yolk to their color for tanning. They explained that there was life in the egg yolk, so mixing it with the die they were transferring the spirit of that new life to their own creation. Leonora started mixing an egg yolk to her own oil colors, bringing new life to her painting.

In my Reckless book, there is a whole final section of advices of “ how to do”, written in an alphabet format. A resource guide is also there to help readers deciding where to look to find their own inspiration.

Inspiration vs Aspiration

We live in an “aspirational” society. Aspiration and ambition could be good things but often drive people crazy. Aspiration refers to material things you can possess. Inspiration refers to immaterial things you wish to be. When you choose “have” versus “be”, you set yourself up for disappointment and frustration. No matter how nicer car or bigger house you will buy, there will always be some better ones you could have and don’t. It’s the famous “greener lawn” stereotype and, as with many stereotypes, there is some truth to it.

But if you shift focus and perspective, and choose to look for inspiration instead, you’ll have a garden of discoveries at hand. You are what you are by essence, sure. But you also grow into a new person day by day, depending on what experiences you have. What you do counts. How you do it, even more. What you eat, what you read, what you listen to, but also how you look around. The way you listen and observe and learn. The way you interact with others.

It’s like nature. A plant will bloom earlier and more bountiful depending on what nourishments she will receive. You are the gardener responsible of you own blooming. Look for inspiration, and you will become an inspiring person as well. And the best part of gardening yourself is that it is the most creative task you can imagine. Instead of consuming, you will be producing. And your “work” will produce something—a new and better you—that will give you the same satisfaction an artist gets form his/her work. You’re your never to-be-finished masterpiece. You are a life-project that will never end. Not even death will interrupt this creative project because you will live in the legacy you’ll live behind. Isn’t that just GREAT?

The Age Trap

One of the greatest satisfactions of living a reckless life is having no regrets.
At least not for things you wanted to do, could have done and didn’t. It’s never too late, really. Just go ahead and do it. Oh, now you’re thinking: “I should have done those things earlier on, when I was younger, had more energy and strength”. Right? Wrong. There is no age limit to start living a reckless life. It’s all about switching gear. Switch gear in how you envision time. “Time is a fire that consumes me, but I am the fire”. I chose this quote of J. L. Borges as the opening statement for my book, Reckless, because it express my relationship with time.

That's how I feel every minute of my life. That’s how I felt when I was 20 as well. Maybe it’s because I’ve always tried to keep alive the feeling of being invincible that Karen Blixen depicts as what characterizes youth. Maybe is because, as Beatrice Woods suggested me on her 103rd birthday, the secret for longevity is “a healthy diet of young men and a bit of chocolate every day”. I don’t care if men are young or not in age, I care about their spirit. I am definitely attracted only to people—men or women—who have passion, the so-called fire within. That’s the real fountain of youth.

The other thing that keeps you young, in my experience, is… keep playing. Play with your kids. Play with your lovers. Play with your friends. Play with your dog. Play with yourself. Live life as a big fun game. And remember, it’s not so much about all the toys you can get. It’s more about the games you can invent to entertain yourself and others. Next on be-reckless.com, you will find games that you can play to become more reckless. Adventures to play that will make you more adventurous in real life. Inspiring characters that you can choose to experiment with, impersonating them on screen and later remembering the feeling in real life. I’m working on it. It will be here soon. How soon it’s just ….a matter of time.