My 17th Birthday Present

The smartest thing I’ve done in my life has been having a baby when I was 16. Please, don’t jump from the chair or delete this blog from your bookmarks. I am not an advocate of teenage pregnancy. I’m not an advocate of having children only when your life is already on tracks either. What’s important to me is that you have children if and when you really want to, and that you’re sure to want them not only to fill some kind of void in your life.

When I was 16, I had a great life and loved it. I loved children too, while I was very disappointed to see how parents acted with them. All parents, my own included, who were not that bad but didn’t make me feel like I was such a wonderful gift. All the parents I saw were tired, nervous, irritable or distracted. Busy with the worries of their adult lives. So when I was about 14. I decided that I wanted to have a baby as soon as I could. That way, I’d have had plenty of energy and appreciation. I would still enjoy playing with my child, and I would keep growing when he/she was growing up. Together. I wanted to feel “together” with my child every minute of my life.

But I was the daughter of parents separated since my birth, and didn’t like missing my father. My child would have a father , I decided, so I’d “wait” for the right man to come along. My not-so-romantic idea of love, forged on my own family experience, was: love ends. But understanding, friendship and support can survive. I want a man who can be a great father for my son even after our love will pass away. I didn’t have to wait too long. When I met Franco, it was just a matter of months before I carried his baby. We were the two happiest people in the world when we found out, and everybody else around us was desperate, trying to dissuade us with the perspective of a miserable future.

Daniele was born a few hours past my 17th birthday. Franco was then 23. We still did anything we had dreamed about, and we became the best people we could have become. Surely better because we had this baby to remind us, any given day, that living by desire instead of fear is the key to fulfill your life. Franco and I separated when Daniele was 5. But, guess what? We brought him up together. We still like each other. We enjoy spending time together still now that Daniele is an adult.

What more could I wish for?

Comments

[Yeahhhh]

you are insane and this should not be posted online. And you and Franco separated anyway so whats your point

[Laura]

I think that this post could be read by teenage girls and taken badly, however, I also commend you for offering an alternative view on teenage pregnancy.

I know many women who became pregnant at that age and are glad that they had kids young - other are not.

[Anne]

i think this is a wonderful story.
As a teenager who wanted to get pregnant herself, this is all but true. i never did in the end as i never found my mr right. but a child to most is the best present anyone could give you.

[meow]

woaahh!

[Jack Zufelt]

Great story. Always nice to hear when these stories have a happy ending.

[Lolo Bornack]

hmm interesting take on having a kid at such a young age. But if you look at it anthropologically people have been having kids that young for centuries. I personally want to be mature enough for a child financially and socially.

[Lolo Bornack]

oh and i didnt take it the wrong way and im 17. if a teen girl is so easily swayed by a blog then shes a idiot anyways.